Study

Person A: I wish I could get a grant to continually study sex.
Person B: What would you call a person that does that?
Person A: Divorced.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Trouble Inside (is it the worst of it?)

Dark-shaped room is full of tonight.



Her empty glances pan the space until
Black bedroom door defined by the
Pre-afterglow yellow of the hallway light
And colored by the evening's feelings
Comes into her solitarian view.

My eyes are open to her and focused.
Her soft, smooth meaningful grasp slips
Underneath my right array of visible
Heart-protecting bone structures.

I am guided closer to her puckering/
Taut, intense pressured lips are mine--
Eyes o p e n [afraid to close them].

Lightning from her lips to our brains--
simultaneously. I relaxed...and closed my eyes.

[OH NO!]

* * * F L A S H * * *

I thought of you, again.

His overexposed emotions flowed through

Each lip offering himself into, deep

Into more than physical body--soul.

That physical soul searching that did

NOT quite catch me then, did/is now.

Hearts don't connect like dots normally--

Do they? Ours did. But circumstances

Hurt the feelings that didn't know them.

I live now with one Eye closed--

Just to keep this memory alive.

Then, she said, I love you, Amelie.

I snapped back into the present moment.

What I feared doing, I did. I closed

my eyes and rememebered him while

I was with her, my Emily.

6.4.2004

What shall be the topic of today's discussion? I still do not know. I will just ramble on:


The sky is darkening upon the set of the sun among the treetop's horizon; nine fifteen is closing time. How wonderful is the scenery at the color pinacle of that day--boundaries are not set; without rules we run wild--we are young--it is okay. Tease the temptress with few tricks to taste the inquiry. How strong is your brew that came across my teeth? my lips? my fingertips?

***This is my deviously curled smirk showing***

3.23.2005

Dare I look into those eyes

To surprise myself again?
I always seemed to wonder why
They appeared so different…

Gazing down deep into you
I found myself amazed to find
A soul so sweet, so rare; so few
Out there connected to a mind;
We defined time to pick & mine,
To test each other’s intellect.
Skin to skin we would intertwine

As a metaphor to our words.

Caution

"There are two questions that we have to ask ourselves. The first is 'where am I going?' and the second is, 'who will go with me?' If you ever get these questions in the wrong order, you are in trouble."


- Howard Thurman

6.30.2005

I come to you now and again--simultaneously.

You, I come to you--my only friend minus judgement.

I come to you weeping the window into my pain:

This window is tinted and mirrored--no VIPs allowed.

Along this path so winding, I, again, have lost my way:

For a plan so strong and true

Attempted by a man so weak and new

1 part loneliness plus 3 parts protector

= uncertainty about future.

If only you, my friend could do more than listen.

Do you? Do you actually understand?

If there was anyone that knows the most truth

It would be you--almighty secret keeper.

Then, do you understand the most truth I have provided?

Do you trust it?

It is mine; though, I share it with you,

Yet, even I don't trust it [always].

The most truth is mostly mine, how can I not trust it?!

Is it me that cannot be trusted? Is it me that is plagued?

How many masks are we up to?

How many awards have I missed opportunities to receive?

I am not an actor, but I have the best scripts.

My audience believes me! They love me!

I am not so hidden anymore.

You've found what didn't want to be found.

Am I happy with that? No.

So, I come to you, my friend. This time I need more than an eye. I need you to tell me that I can make the decision without questioning loss. As risks are a part of life. I am here to stay and live with my sadness. Face down from the tinted mirror. I've hurt myself again.

My audience was me. I believed my mostly truth and I shouldn't have.

Tonight, I am playing the outer organ with orange coated razor blade kisses--they sting so sweetly.

Bliss was believing. Ignorance was not Bliss as Masks could not hide

Myself from Me

Quotes

"What difference is there between us, save a restless dream that follows my soul but fears to come near you?"

-Kahlil Gibran, "The Captive King"
 
 
"Silence is one of the hardest arguments to refute."

Josh Billings

Do You Empathize?

Just when I thought

-I had everything right
I found out I ought
-To step out of sight

"He doesn't rattle"--
-Most of you would agree
Yet, I fight battles
-I have within...me.

Outside my skull,
-My heart, these bones, this skin
Lies a world so full,
-Unique--I chagrin.

When cut I bleed,
-When I hurt, I hide it.
Sadness isn't freed--
-Why do I chide it?

If what I do
-Is where focus should be,
Why do I pursue
-Strife internally?

What is the rule?
-Am I right; am I wrong?
Am I just a fool?
-Do (hear/here) I belong?

Haiku Challenge #3

Forgotten:

I saw you today.

Why aren't you forgotten?

I should not look past.

Haiku Challenge #2

"Bloom"



Quiet explosives
Pain, despair--exhibited.
Yet, life still goes bloom!

Haiku Challenge #1

A friend

sent me a text that read:

Haiku using the word "sea". Go.


So, I responded with:

Sea life and see life

Where does your perspective go?

Not unlimited

Once Again...It is again.

You'll find out more later.